How to make any girl fall in love with you..

Hello Gentleman,

I am here to give some great advice with a shit-oad of sarcasim and a mild tone of bitchyness all for the greater good of men and woman on this earth. Aren't I just the best!

HOW TO MAKE WOMAN FALL IN LOVE WTH YOU, or at least like you a lot.

Instant swoon, I bet he never leaves wet towels on the bed!

Really guys I feel like we all need to know what makes women just absolutely swoon over you or you know at least want to sleep with you on the regular. Also I should point out I'm not talking about the easy girls. You know the ones you meet at the bar, makeout with, take home, and "casually sleep with" while she thinks you're dating. Thouh I am sure they are SO MUCH FUN! I'm not talking about just sex. I'm talking about the chase, the awkward should I hold your hand..is it okay if I kiss her courting, and some sort of actual relationship. Also, if this doesn't work, she really doesn't have any interest in you. Go find some random woman at the bar, you'll survive. You're a man, hunt and gather some ladies!

First thing is first lets talk about appearances. Now we all know once you are in a relationship it's perfectly okay to look like a slob from time to time. But if you seriously want a girl to consider you please put a little effort in to yourself. Fix your facial hair (if you can grow any) , buy some new kicks every once in a while, and wear clothes that fit. Do not wear your glow in the dark ghetto ganster shirt the first time you see this chick, make sure there isn't a stain on your shirt, and throw the goddamn shirt n the dryer to loosen a few wrinkles. SO EASY, SO APPRECIATED.

Make fun of us. By make fun, I mean poke fun. No do not poke our "love handles". Do not embarass us in front of everyone but making  joke about how much useless stuff is in our handbag or how messy our car is can be cute. Just don't call us fat. Ever. Especially when were eating.

If we think tuna is chicken, feel free to harass us.



Kittens=Boobies. Beer is yummy.

Follow our cues..for example if I laugh at something you say and touch your leg that means I wouldn't mind if you touched me..(no don't go straight for my kittens, be a little discreet you horn-ball, it's called affection not groping) If we say how much we love Red's ice-cream suggest we go grab some vanilly crunch coat cones, if we walk in front of you, check out our ass...get it? I hope so. Also, if my beer is empty, please hand me another one.
Complement something about us. If you really wanna earn extra points make it original. But anything from ,"I like your earrings" to "you're legs looks great in that dress" works for us.
Deep down were all attention whores.

Make a joke, do something stupid..please do not show off.  It's not sexy to watch a guy get in a fight. Don't try to seem cool and tough around your friends cause then we are going to know how much of an insecure pansy you are. Unless someone insults my shoes. Then feel free to brawl.

But honestly, humor and being okay with being a little silly go a long way. It shows us your comfortable with who you are.



This is cute.

This is not.

Don't be afraid to show off your nerdy side too. If you know all of the presidents in alphabetical order or collect Spider-man comics we're only going to find you more endearing. Except of course if you collect actual spiders and dress up like George Washington for Halloween, wig wooden teeth and all.



If you can make a girl laugh you can make her do anything. Remember that. If you abuse it she won't be laughing and neither will her angry girl posse either.



Make some decisions. I think especially around my age bracket (18-30) women make a lot of the decisions about what you're going to do in your relationship/dating life. Guess what, we don't like it all that much. For once pick the movie, the restaurant, tell me that we're going to watch some football game in the freezing cold weather. Half the time it doesn't even depend where we're going. We just want to snap a picture, post it on Facebook, and make everyone else feel jealous we have a hot boyfriend and are doing way cooler shit than they are.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, just ask us what we want!!!

She loves her new bikini, handbag, and flowers!

I just had this conversation the other day. A girl's boyfriend bought her Celtics tickets for her birthday. She thought, "Wow I'd really like to go to a Celtics game but that cute Victoria's Secret bathing suit I've been hinting at for a month was less expensive and something I would have got a lot more use out of." If your dating someone would you rather see them in jeans and a t shirt or a skimpy swimsuit...hmmm tough choice? We drop hints ALL the time. Just put a reminder in your phone or ask your mom what to get us. It's so simple!



Do not put wet towels on the bed. Maybe this is just me. But my god I will love you forever if you never leave towels on my bed..even more..if you make it..okay..too much..understandable.

Shut us up by kissing us. It's a foolproof method when we go into ramble mode. You're guaranteed to make us go quiet if we actually can't talk.

Okay, so these MAY not make someone fall in love with you...but they certainly will help things go a whole hell of a lot smoother.

Enjoy your dose of love, happiness, and not so happy endings

Teen